I've been up all night. I just can't get to sleep. I have been knitting and listening to music and seem to only find sad songs....
I think I need to make an appointment with someone. I feel depression creeping back in.
Why do I feel so down right now? At first when I tried to figure it out I couldn't think of a reason but then I remembered...
A friend of mine just lost her spouse to cancer. I'm really sad for her. I've been thinking of how I would feel if I lost my husband. I would be completely lost.
I've also been having dreams about having a baby and every time something goes wrong and I wake up distressed. My boys are grown and don't care much about me anymore. I miss spending time with them. I miss talking with them and getting more than one word answers. I miss my babies. I miss my toddlers. I miss my little boys and I miss my teenagers. I miss being needed. I miss having a purpose.
Also, mother's day is really doing me in. Every website had a mother's day promotion. Every email has a mother's day theme.... but not everyone has a mother still on earth.
