I'm so tired I can't sleep

I was tired a long time ago but I just can't get comfortable because my back is hurting.  I think I did too much.  My RLS (restless leg syndrome) is making me crazy too and I already took my medicine for it.  ugh.

Anyway, I am really happy though. My baby will be 20 on the 19th. I just can't believe he's so old (and I'm so much older). His birthday always sneaks up on me since it is so soon after Christmas but I always want to make sure he doesn't get cheated because of that. I just got him a bunch of clothes for Christmas so I was quizzing him out to try to figure out what to get him for his birthday. He is not very picky and doesn't care that much about details (which really drives me nuts). If he needs pants or a shirt he just says that's what he needs and doesn't care about the color or style as long as it isn't crazy. He doesn't want bright colors or designs he said. He just says what he doesn't want but never exactly what he does want. He finally said he would like a couple polo shirts like his dad wears to work because he is trying to get a job. He wants to make sure he has things he can wear at work even though he has no idea where it will be at or what they will require.

I do know that he needs a new cell phone though.  He has my old iphone 4 and the speakers are messed up so people calling can't hear him. He really likes music and likes using itunes. I talked to my husband and he just bought him an iphone 7 for his birthday. It will probably be a little bit late but my son will be so surprised. I can't wait to see his face when he gets it.

He is such a good kid and always jumps up to help me when I am in pain. So many times I've woken up and staggered out of my room in so much pain and he jumps into action to help. He grabs my medicine and gets me a glass of water and takes care of whatever else needs to be done. Our beagle puppy sees me and gets all excited and starts whining and jumping up and down in his pin. My son takes care of him and gets him settled down. I appreciate him so much and I'm so glad that he can have something like this that I know he really wants. He also things it is too much and doesn't expect more than whichever phone is free or at the most a refurbished older model iphone. I love that boy.

Okay, I'm going to try to lay down again and maybe try to read a few lines if possible.

Beautiful pain

How can something so beautiful cause so much pain?

I look outside and I see the most beautiful fall colored carpet surrounding the trees. It is almost as if the trees are dancers dressed for a autumnal ball in golden, russet, amber and scarlet gowns flowing in gleaming satin circles around them. The men, standing straight and tall in their evergreen suits and matching pocket squares, guiding them around the room in elegant patterns. Then, as if the scene wasn't glorious enough, large flakes of snow catch the light as it ever-so-slowly drifts to the ground like feathers from angel's wings.  Can you see it too?

I woke up in the most pain I've had in a long time. After the snow melted it started to rain and that is when my pain shot through the roof. The doctor's would ask me what number I'd give it on a scale of 1-10. The numbers all start to blur together at some point and I can't even think straight to think about it. I do know though, that it is the most beautiful pain. Who knew, changing weather could do that?

I've been trying to do things this week but I can't. I can't think. I can't read. I can't do any of the things I like to do. It is so strange for me to go a whole week without cracking open a book or 3. I also have a knitting project I'm anxious to work on but it is a challenging one and I'm so afraid to mess it up. I started to watch this week's episodes of The Voice on Hulu but I couldn't focus on it. I keep spacing out so I decided to watch it later. Now I'm watching some old episodes of Bones, which I love.

The days of this week have all gotten muddled together and I have spent a lot of time sleeping or snuggled deep in a pile of blankets. Music helps. Sometimes I like slow, sad music and other times I need angry, rock music.

I'm just glad that this will pass and the pain will decrease to more tolerable levels again. Then, I'll be back to "I CAN" and I will.

Crisis averted

So a few days ago I turned on my computer and noticed it was running really slow.  It had been doing that for a while and I deleted a few things to see if it helped.  I restarted and after just a few minutes I got this blue screen of death.  The windows 8 version of the blue screen of death even has a frownie face like this ---> ; (  So did I.    My husband was leaving for work when it happened so he saw it but he had to go.  He works in IT so I was so sad to see him go.  Anyway, my computer restarted and after about a minute it crashed again and wouldn't turn back on.  This was early in the morning so I had all day to find things to do.

Good morning afternoon

So I woke up today at 3:40 pm. It was already pretty much dark outside.  I live in Alaska so it gets dark early here.  The lights were all off except the Christmas tree with just white lights and lots of sparkly clear ornaments in the shape of snowflakes and ice cycles.  I just turned on some soft music and enjoyed the atmosphere.

Happy 2015.  I'm determined to have a better year than last year.

My main goal this year is to lose weight and get healthier.  I need to work on muscle strength.

I know that everyone pretty much has that same goal but for me it is different. I have been gaining weight because of the chronic pain and not being able to do a lot of things that I used to.  When I exercise I get flares of pain and then later or the next day it is even worse because I get a fibromyalgia flare up.  I try very hard to limit myself so I don't cause a flare up but it is hard to know when is too much.  People like to tell me "no pain no gain" and I just want to sock them in the head because they have no idea what they are talking about.  Pain from muscle soreness is way way different than this.

Anyway, I got some resistance bands and I'm going to use those to help build up some muscle.  I am very weak so I easily pull muscles I didn't even know I had.  The worst is when I pull a muscle in my ribs or I get muscle spasms all over the place.  I am going to start very very small and just work my way up from there.

My secondary goal is to work on my house and organize and purge a lot of junk.  I already started some in December.  I had all these different tubs of Christmas ornaments in different color schemes. I donated all the red and gold ornaments except my old fashioned style ones.  My favorite color scheme is blue and silver/white.  I can't really do much with the tree anymore and my boys are too old now and just don't want to.  It just doesn't feel right to make them decorate the Christmas tree. It kind of kills the spirit.  So really, what is the point in going through all the work in they don't care.  I realized it is just for me now.  I like having a Christmas tree.  So I am slowly working my way through the decorations I have and donating a ton of it.

I've decided to do this yearly challenge again from a website called Home Storage Solutions 101. I've done it before but not entirely.  I just skipped around and did a few things.  A lot of the time I just can't do anything because of my health so I can only do what I can.  They do have a monthly calendar with missions and things so this year I plan on putting it on the frig so the rest of the family can help too.  Last time I was just doing a screen print and making the current month my desktop image.  I hate printing everything and having to deal with all the papers and where to keep them.  This year I'll welcome the help and I'm sure my husband will be all for it.  They even have a new facebook group for this years challenge.

So there ya go.  I am just like everyone else who most likely has the same two goals.  These are not resolutions though.  I will not feel like a failure if I don't lose 20 lbs or finish the organizational challenge.  I'll feel good just knowing I tried and did the best I could.

Merry Christmas

I'm having a hard time as usual with all the aches and pains from the cold but there is also that additional pain from missing my mom at Christmas.  My mom died Feb 16, 2008 and I still miss her every single day.  It is just always more difficult when my birthday comes around and I know she would have called me.  My birthday was on thanksgiving this year.  Then just a little bit later is her birthday on December 8th and of course Christmas Day is hard too.  Well, all I can do is think of her and make some new wonderful memories with my family that are here.

Here is some nice Christmas music from the first, third, and sixth seasons of Bones to get the spirit of Christmas flowing strong.

Season 5, Episode 10

Long time no post

It's been awhile so I thought I should get on here and post something.  I had a great birthday which was Thanksgiving Day this year.  My husband surprised me by getting me 2 things I'd been wanting for a long time.  I had added them to my amazon wishlist and was planning on saving up for them. So far every time I'd saved up some money something would come up and I'd end up spending it on one of my boys.  Of course I could have asked my husband to give them some money but sometimes (and especially some things) I want to come from me.  The look on their face when I give them the money when they thought I didn't have any is priceless.  They know I don't have much money so it means more to them and they are always more than willing to help

me with things around the house to make up for it.  My oldest son had a job for a while and he was always buying me gifts.  He even bought me a Keurig for Christmas and I know that cost a lot.  So that shows that it comes back around and it isn't about the gift but the love.

Anyway, speaking of love, my husband told me there was this big box by the door and I should go check it out.  This was a few days early.  I was shocked that the box was so big.  It was HUGE.  I had been feeling really bad the past few weeks.  My hands hurt and I've very weak all over so both my boys helped me open the box.  They both had this grin on their faces and I could tell they already knew what it was.  They got me a Kitchenaid mixer in the prettiest shade of pistachio green.  I have been wanting one of those since forever.  There was also this small gift and it turned out to be Rocksmith 2014 for the xbox 360. It comes with a cable that has a usb plug on one end and a standard guitar hookup on the other end.  I've wanting to play the guitar for a long time and I have a very nice electric guitar that was another gift from my husband.  It is an Eddie Van Haylen Wolfgang special which they stopped making around 97 I think.

I've been wanting to learn how to play my guitar for so long but something always got in my way. My health was my biggest obstacle and by the time I got the guitar out, hooked up and tuned up I would be exhausted. Rocksmith basically simplifies everything so I can start playing quicker and that helps a lot. I just plug the guitar in to the xbox and it acts like the amp.  You tune the guitar with the program which is very quick.  I'm usually tuned up in less than a minute.  The electric tuner I got is not just for guitar so it could be used for my son's violin as well.  My problem was that I would be trying to tune to the wrong octave (when I first started out) and I'd break strings.  Rocksmith's tuner has this line that moves up and down and you line it up with the string to get it in tune.  It also has numbers that are positive or negative so you can be sure you are turning the peg the right direction. After a week of using it I've already gotten to where I can hear when it is off and can tune it myself.  Mainly the big E string is what I start with and I tune it to what sounds good to me and then I check myself to be sure.  Then I've been tuning the other strings off of that one.  The first few times I checked it with the rocksmith tuner after that and it was in tune.  Now when I feel bad and have no energy I can just sit back on the couch and play without it plugged in.

I am still learning about the Rocksmith program and there are still things to learn but it was bothering me that most of the time it doesn't show the name of the notes or the strings (like the strings played open are E A D G B E in order).  They use a graphic of the neck of a guitar that lies horizontally across the bottom of the screen.  The strings are color coded and they indicate which note to play by color.  I was getting frustrated because I didn't want to learn red string, green string, yellow string.  I wanted to learn by the notes.  I used to play piano in high school and learned to read music so it is weird to not know which note I'm hearing.  I have some books and I've been looking online for more information.

My favorite website so far is www.justinguitar.com.  I have been going through his free beginner lessons and I have been learning a lot.  My fingers are very sore now but I can feel the tips starting to toughen up already.  I've learned two cords now and I really want to play a song!  Maybe I could learn a simple Christmas song before Christmas.

Music from Bones Season 4

I haven't been feeling well for a while so I've been spending a lot of days in bed and watching Bones season 4.  I really love this show and all the good music they use.  Many of the great songs they use don't get full play.  They sometimes just use it in the background or just play a few seconds of the music with no singing for effect.  Of course, I have learned that some of the music they use isn't good any other way.  I like to collect the songs I liked here and then come back and listen to them again. This isn't an all inclusive list.  If I don't like it (or if it isn't new to me) I don't include it.  The music that really captures me will get purchased and downloaded or in some cases I have to search for the actual CD and order it and then WAIT for the mail.  That seems so archaic these days.
I loved this song from Episode 1 although the OooooOooooo's get on my nerves .

With the graceful and grotesque the morning rings
Hear the garbage truck roll by
Hear the birds begin to sing
Their song of love and praise
And may their happy sound
Be strong enough to raise
Our spirits off the ground
Or love don't stand a ghost of a chance

I'm on the trail of a storm and everywhere I look
Appear the ones that life has torn
Like pages from a book
Left to soldier on
No shoulder for to lean I'd be lost without a song
But if your love wasn't there for me
I just wouldn't stand a ghost of a chance

From where I sit
There's too many eyes crying tears
Too many lives living in fear
Wondering where their sweet dreams have all gone
Too many hands stirring the pot In a land of haves and have-nots All wondering why it's all gone wrong

Now as the ballet and burlesque commence to play
Give to me the strength to act
And not look the other way
For there's a war outside
Can't take it lying down
Got to look it in the eye
We've got to stand our ground
Or love don't stand a ghost of a chance
Love don't stand a ghost of a chance

Lyrics from Songlyrics.com

This song really makes me think of myself living with Fibromyalgia.  It really does feel like "everything is slipping away" and I am always "just trying to stay on the ground."

From Episode 4

From Episode 5

I have never heard of Katie Gray before but I love her beautiful voice.  I will definitely be looking up more music by her.  I also love the Eastern Indian sound. The way they sing and the rhythms are so enticing to me.

From Episode 7

From Episode 8

From Episode 9

Maybe I'm just cranky but I really don't like the way she sings "what am I supposed to do-oooo-oo with you"  but other than that it isn't as bad song.  Too bad that is such a huge but.

From Episode 11

This is another artist that I'll be looking into.  I have already found more music by him that I like.  There is a song called Let it Rain that I really love.

From Episode 12

From Episode 14

From Episode 17

From Episode 18

From Episode 20

From Episode 24

From Episode 25

This song was interesting.  On the show Dr. Lance Sweets (John Francis Daley) and his band "Gormagon" performed this song and I was thinking how cool it was that he was actually singing.  In the credits it said the song was by the Dayplayers, a band from Los Angeles, California, but I was sure that was the voice of the actor.  It turns out that John aka Sweets sings and plays the piano and other things for the band Dayplayers.  It seems they are not well known so I didn't find much about them but here is their self-titled EP released in Feb 2012 and a song called See it All that was released in Oct 2012,  It is pretty good stuff.

Now I'm going to snuggle back in bed and watch Season 5

Fishy Business and Bones

I finally started feeling better yesterday and then I promptly overdid it.  Since the shoes with the arch support seemed to keep my feet from hurting I decided to get some exercise on my stationary bike.  I did 15 minutes while I read.  15 minutes is a lot for me.  I also did a load of laundry, mopped the bathroom floor and cleaned a little in the bathtub.  Then I told my husband we should go on a little date tomorrow and go eat somewhere.  I should never do that because every time I do I can never get out of bed the next day.  I hurt all night and couldn't sleep for a long, long time.  After I finally fell asleep I was out all day.

I woke up to an asthma attack around 7 pm.  That was fun.  <-- sarcasm  I can only assume it was set off by the bleach I used.  I really need to quit using that stuff.  

My husband was super sweet and made dinner.  He made potato soup in the crock pot and has Rhodes (frozen) bread rising.  If he didn't make something one of my boys would have.  Son #2 likes to cook things like pizza and spaghetti.  Son #1 often makes stir fry/fried rice or chicken fettuccine. I'm very blessed.  

I've been sitting here staring at my 55 gallon fish tank for a few minutes and trying to count my fish. Not long ago I bought about 16 or so new fish, including 6 male guppies. The prettiest one with the royal blue body and aqua tail was dead by morning but that was the only guppy I've removed.  Now there are only 2 swimming around but no floaters or sinkers.  I think Sid, the Bala shark, is getting hungry or something.  They said they should be fine in with him but since I'm not finding any dead guppies....  or parts of guppies...  hmmm  I need to turn the castle over but I hate to freak out Waldo the upside-down catfish and Raymond the super-skittish plecostomus.  I checked the water and things look good there.  I don't think I'll be buying any more guppies.  They were not intended to be feeder fish.  

The reason I ended up with a Bala shark is because I went into Petco (only place in town to get fish now besides Walmart) and they had some small ones.  My tank was almost empty since the ones I had were very old.  I asked about the Bala sharks (which were only about an inch long) and told them the size of my tank etc.  Well, she sold me 6 of them but didn't think it was important to tell me they could each get 10"!  My tank is not big enough for that but next morning a few were dead and I went back in to talk to them.  Turns out their tank had ich and a bunch at the store had died too.  I started to notice some white spots on a few of them and I treated the tank.  I ended up with only this one surviving out of the 6 and Sid still acts a little weird at times like it affected his widdle-bitty fish brain.  Sometimes he looks like he is chasing his tail going in tight circles.  He could be a circus fish! They told me to wait a certain amount of time (weeks) to let things normalize in the tank before getting more but insisted that I get at least 4 more so he can school.  When I finally went back in there there was a different girl and she looked at me like I was crazy.  She said they are like tinfoil barbs and get the same size (10 - 12").   So now I just have the one and he seems to doing okay. Since the other girl was obviously clueless I don't know if the weird spinning in circles thing is normal for that type of fish or not.  I *think* he seems to get agitated and swim around fast while kind of flipping side to side when he is hungry.  That is a guess but usually I put food in there and then he seems to settle down.  He eats a lot and seems to like blood worms the most.  I really like him so I'll keep him as long as I can.  If he starts eating or picking on my larger fishes I'll have to take him back for adopting out.  I'd be sad though.

Anyway, here are a few songs from Bones Season 3.

From Episode 5 - Young Men Dead by Black Angels 

I like the 70's psychedelic feel this group has.  If you like it and have some time you can keep listening.  This is a playlist with a TON of their music.

From Episode 7 - Bandstand in the Sky by Pete Yorn

 

It turns out that this song was written after the death of Jeff Buckley who drowned.  Very sad.

From Episode 8 - Sail Away by Madrugada

I just want to sail away

From it all

Freedom is impossible

This I know

From Episode 10 - a very fitting video called Bones by the Killers

My favorite part is at 3:10 - 3:12

From Episode 13- Fountain by Sara Lov

I hate to say it but I really find this song annoying.

 

Happy Post Halloween

I'm so glad that Halloween is finally over.  I used to enjoy handing out candy to the cute little monsters that come to my house but since I've been feeling bad most of the time I have come to dread it.  We mostly get the really young kiddos here, especially since I never put up really scary things, and by 9 pm everyone is usually heading home.  I had a migraine today and ended up staying in bed all day.  I didn't even look to see if I recognized any cute little kids.  We usually get a few that come to say hi to me.  Son #2 stayed out in the living room and tried to get to the door before anyone knocked or rang the doorbell because our beagle Blue goes ballistic and barks like mad.  She is old and barks at the slightest sound now and it really scares the little kiddos so Son #1 keeps her shut up in his room until after 9 pm.

Speaking of Blue the crazy mad beagle monster, I think it is pretty ironic that I'm just randomly started Bones from the beginning again and just happened to get to episode 5 of Season 3 on Halloween Night, and it is a Halloween episode.  This song was on that episode and I actually recognize it.  I think it was on a Halloween CD I bought for the boys when they were young and still cute.

Anyway, after a while I decided to get my butt up and make something for everyone to eat but I couldn't stand to walk on my feet.  I decided to try what the doctor suggested sort of...  she isn't very clear really and makes me feel like a kindergartner again back in school getting snarked at by the teachers who didn't want to bother paying attention.  This doctor is very snarky and I don't like her much.  I have to go in at regular intervals to get my meds refilled and I tell her how I've been doing (which is always bad) and she just blows it off as nothing.  She looks in all the holes in my head and listens to me breathe and writes down that I am stable or improving.  Anyway, I've been complaining about this pain in my feet for a long time.  She always just told me to walk more even though I told her it hurt to much to walk. Finally, the last time I saw her she said to get some tennis shoes with arch support.  My husband was there that time and told her I rarely go outside so I never really wear shoes. She had no reply so that was it. Well today I decided to pull out a pair of tennis shoes I used to wear and clean them up to wear inside only.  I put gel insoles with arch supports in them (which I robbed from my boots) and I've been wearing them for a few hours.  I made another quiche and it seems they do help.  I was able to make the whole thing and clean up without having to ask for help.  I am pretty excited that this is helping because I'm really tired of being stuck sitting down. Being able to be on my feet more will also allow me to get more exercise.  I'll start on that tomorrow.  For now, my dog is very happy to see me so I need to go spend some time with her.

Here is a song from Episode 1 of Bones Season 3

I like this song.  Now that I have these shoes that help my feet I want to get up and do things. I may not be able to "see the world" but being able to do anything makes me feel better.

Stuck on the Couch

Since the temperature has dropped and the landscape has become whiter I've been having a lot more pain, especially in my feet and my shoulders.  The meds do help somewhat  except for my feet.  I just want to sit on the couch and never stand up unless absolutely necessary.  This could be my new diet plan.  Anyway, I'm pretty set here.  I've got my husband's wool socks on, my laptop and I've been watching episodes of Bones season 2 and looking up the music from the shows and crocheting like a mad woman.

I can't really think straight so I just made up a pattern for these little wash cloths.  I like them to be about the size of my hand and to have some texture but still look nice.  They come out to about 5" square before washing so just a little bigger than a sponge.  I am making them color coded so I know which ones are for which purpose.  I'm using this green and white cotton yarn to make cloths for cleaning in the kitchen and I'll choose a different color for cleaning in the bathrooms.  I made some with some peach and natural colors for my face cloths.  I'll make some in blues for the boys face cloths etc.

I'm addicted to this show.  I read this story in the news about a man that was killing women and leaving them in abandoned buildings and right away I was thinking about Bones and wished I could watch that episode.

Anyway, these songs are from Episode 9 - Aliens in a Spaceship.  

Next to You by Tim Easton

This song which says it is by Bob Gentry was apparently produced by him but not sang by him.... unless Bob has a very high pitched voice.  This youtube video says "Amie" so maybe that is who the singer is.  It is called Never Know.  This song was playing on the radio when Brennan and Hodgins woke up to find themselves buried alive in a car (at the start of the show).  It is such a pretty song but they somehow made it sound eerie with it getting fuzzy and breaking up.  Of course, it then goes back to explain how they got there and what happened after.

 

From Episode 14

Tears and Laughter by Jonathan Czerwik

It was very interesting listening to son #2's opinion on what this song is about.  I'm very literal and he is very philosophical.  He tells me I have to think deeper to get to the true meaning.  

 

From Episode 15

The Secret Sun by Jesse Harris

Fault Line by Black Rebel Motorcycle Club

Bones Season 2 Episode 8

The woman in the sand

I love this show and especially this episode.  I loved it when they dressed up to blend in but Booth looked more like a guy from the 20's.  It seems more like he dressed to blend in to the wrong era.  Of course their fake names were Tony & Roxy lol

So the music for the episode on Vegas of course involved Elvis  

Nice outfits huh? 

 The second song is Wolf like Me by TV On The Radio

It's a catchy tune and I kinda like it.  The video is funny too.

This song was used as background music with a lot of other sound over it.  I'm glad I looked it up so I could hear the whole thing.

Distraction Tactic

I'm trying not to worry about my dog Blue so I'm went back to watching Season 2 of Bones and listening for more good music.  This series has a lot of music that I love and have never heard of before.

This song was on Episode 3 and it really tied in well with the story line. Well, at least some of the phrases did.  It is about a young girl who is a foster child, her boyfriend from a well-off family is found dead and people are quick to blame her because she is in the foster system.  Of course one common phase used when talking about foster children is "fell through the cracks" and this song uses the line "I fell through the cracks at the end of our street."  I especially like how Temperance connects with foster kids.  It may not be as cut and dry as they make it seem but it still gives me more perspective than I had before.

I've heard this song before by Sarah McLachlan and she is actually featured on this track.  Listen closely and you can hear her singing harmony.  I really like this version better.  It is so tender.

Bring On The Wonder by Susan Enan 

 

Episode 4 used a very small portion of this song at the very end.  I'm glad I looked it up so I could hear the whole thing.  Brennan shot and killed a serial killer that was attacking Booth and even though she knows she did the right thing it still bothers her that she took a life.  She killed someone and that matters.  That is one thing I really like about this show.  It may be all about death but it is about justice and finding the truth, even if that isn't the easiest thing.  It isn't about revenge and senseless killing.

It don't matter to the sun by Rosie Thomas

This song is from Episode 7 and another one that they just used a small part at the end
 -
Mona Lisa by Grant-Lee Phillips

 

Sad songs and my dog Blue

Blue at the vet with Son #2

I'm so sad right now.  My sweetest companion, my beagle Blue, is not doing well.  I was up all night with her (Monday night) letting her out every hour and sometimes every 5 minutes.  She threw up her dinner and I just wasn't sure what was wrong or what to do.  In the morning I was so exhausted I would let her out, hooking her up on her chain, and then I'd lay back down and drift off for a few minutes until she scratched to come back in.  Sometimes she would just look at me and then turn around and go back to pee again.  I knew it was strange that she hadn't wanted to eat or drink anything and I was very worried.  A little later when I woke up I noticed by the back door there was blood with some dark, pea sized clots on the kitchen floor where she had peed.  I went outside and looked around and since there is a little snow I could see a few spots where she had peed and it was tinted with blood and one spot I could see dribbled blood.  I called the vet right away and took her in.  She has a nasty bladder infection but also a large tumor in her bladder. They caught a small sample of urine and they are going to try to find some tumor cells and hopefully can determine what type it is.  They gave us some antibiotics for her and an anti inflammatory so that should make her feel better at least.   I am so worried for her.  She is pretty old for a beagle too.  She'll be 14 in February.

On another note,

I watched the pilot episode for season 2 of Bones (again, yes, again) and this song, Be here now by Ray LaMontagne,  caught my attention.  Here is a video tribute to my favorite Spartan warrior that just happens to feature that song. You really have to pay attention and listen to the lyrics because it is so quiet.

It is so sad that he passed away.  So many talented people die much too soon.
There are too many angels and some have four legs.

Here is another song from that episode called The Greatest by Cat Power. I love her voice.

Bones and some of the music I loved from the first season

I don't watch very much TV and usually when I do it has something to do with music.  I like to watch American Idol & The Voice.  I also like mysteries and Crime/law type shows but I usually do more reading in that genre than watching TV.  My husband is a HUGE TV watcher and I think he will watch anything.  I just can't do it.  There has been a few times when I found something I really liked and stayed up all night watching a whole season or 3 but for the most part I never even turn it on.  I listen to music and crochet.

Sometimes though, when I'm laying on my side trying to go to sleep while someone is being shot or maimed on Netflix, I'll end up hearing a song I like from the show he is watching.  I always try my hardest to remember so I can look it up later.  Every once and a while he watches something good like Bones.  He is way ahead of me and I couldn't remember all the shows I watched so I started back at the beginning.  Anyway, I noticed I was hearing a lot of music I really liked and sometimes I actually had to get up and write it down because I didn't want to risk totally forgetting about it.  Here are some of them.

From the Pilot Episode
Of course I already had this song.

I can't leave out this one even though I already posted about it last time.
I bought this whole album.

This is a good song that I already had - from Episode 2.  

From Episode 5

There was a lot of music in Episode 6 but mostly rap which I can't stand. This was the only decent one.  I mostly like the music and the soothing voice.

Episode 9 had Christmas songs and it is just a little early for that. I think I already have them in my itunes or own the CD too so they were not bad. I'm still in denial about the snow that is on the ground outside so I'll wait on those Christmas songs. 

 Goldfrapp from episode 10: I've always liked this song for some reason.  I actually think my friend Rebekah has that same outfit.  

This sad song is from Episode 12.  I'm glad to know that I'm not on my own.

This song from episode 13 makes me which I knew Spanish.

Episode 14 had some great songs that I already loved.

And this song I'd never heard before.

Episode 16: This was the best song from the season and the one I had to get out of bed to go download. 

 

Episode 17: This is a song that really touched my heart. This is how I feel every day dealing with Fibromyalgia and all the other problems that go along with it.  It is sad without being hopeless.  I am not hopeless.  As long as I have God I have hope.

  "Strange how hard it rains now, rows and rows of big dark clouds.  But I'm holding on underneath this shroud.  Rain, rain, rain"
"I'm still alive underneath this shroud"

 

Here is another one that I liked from Episode 18  

Whistles the wind, blowing my way 

Sweeping me back, back here to stay 

Can winners be losers running on the same track? 

Some head for glory, others refresh 

 Well it breaks my heart to see you this way 

The beauty in life, where's it gone? 

And somebody told me, you were doing okay 

Somehow I guess they were wrong 

 My isolation, now there's a sobering thought 

A minute alone, a lifetime too long 

See the face in this mirror, so pale it could crack 

Desperately wanting the color it lacks

 So you drank with the lost souls for too many years 

Time to be right cause they'll cripple with fear 

Never been righteous, though seldom we're wrong 

Life's only life with you in this song 

 Now there's an ocean between us 

Where I am and where I want to be 

So you prayers in doubt, doubt not for me 

 Oh you'll find your way out, but there's no going now 

Every woman and child drags you down for the dive 

It's not safe being free, can't give back what you feel 

You said you'll always be in heaven with me

From Episode 20 

Some goodies I've gotten recently

You know how on Amazon.com you can have a wish list? I have a few things on there that I've been drooling over for a long time. Now I have managed to get two of the things on there this year. I'm so spoiled loved. The first thing was my sewing machine. I had a sewing machine that was too difficult for me to figure out. I wanted something with a button that says "sew" or better yet voice activated. Whenever I feel like I can use my sewing machine I know I don't have much time before I get tired or start having pain and by the time I would get the bobbin thing opened up, the lint cleaned off of it, and new bobbin loaded and inserted into the alien looking piece of metal half circle and the thread pulled up to the top I would be exhausted and needing a nap and a pain pill. I needed something way more user friendly. I looked at several sewing machines online and thought I knew what I wanted and I knew they had the one I wanted to get here locally but when I went in there they didn't have it anymore. After I explained what I was looking for she showed me a Brother machine and I fell in love with it right away. It was better than the one I went in there looking for and it was cheaper too. My husband got it for me for an anniversary present which was September 1st. It was our 23rd anniversary! Of course I've been feeling bad ever since I got it and I haven't been able to check it out yet but it is there ready for me when I'm ready.

It is a Simplicity SB2139 and it isn't available online which is why I didn't see it.  This is only available through local brother dealers.  It came with a free pattern, which is not my size but oh well, and also comes with the sewing table thing that gives you extra sewing surface.

The other thing that has been at the top of my Amazon list is this set of Rose Tulip Etimo crochet hooks.  I wanted them so bad I could taste it (tastes just like chocolate, really).  I noticed they went on sale and mentioned it to my husband and he bought them for me.  I love them too.  They are so comfortable to use and the case is so pretty!  I never was a "girly girl" that liked pink until I turned 40.  Not sure what has happened to me.  It must be the hormones or something.

The CD I got is great too.  It is an import.  The band is called Feeder and the album is Pushing the Senses.  I first heard one of the songs from the album on the first season of Bones, which I just started watching again.  The song is called "Pain on Pain" but I really like all the songs on this album.

So anyway, I've been listening to my new music and crocheting away.  I also bought a few other songs that I heard on Bones on itunes.  For some reason that album above is not available to download which is so barbaric!  It has been so long since I had to buy a CD and wait for it to come in the mail to listen to it.  I could have recorded it off the radio onto a tape by then but of course they don't play good music on the radio anymore. Anywho, there really are some great music in that series.

I am also making a sweater for my sweet beagle Blue. She is getting pretty old and arthritic and it gets pretty cold here in the winter. She has some health problems that make her belly distended so I'm adjusting the pattern to fit her. I hope she likes it.

It is a pretty, sunny day outside today and I'm hoping to get out in it since I'm feeling a little better.  I think I need a new fish in my fish tank and want to make a trip to Petco.

Starting fresh

I decided to start a new blog. My other blog had gotten so dusty and depressing. I decided it was time to make a change, rearrange the furniture and rethink my purpose for blogging. I decided I didn't want my blog to be about how I was feeling. I feel pretty bad pretty much all the time so this blog is going to be about things I do, see, read, hear, etc. I'll write about what makes me happy like getting the most scrumptious yarn from an awesome friend in Australia and finally getting the crochet hook set that I had been coveting forever for an early birthday present. I also got a new CD by a band I just learned about when I decided to rewatch the first season of Bones. Oh, and I recently made a few new friends that bring joy to my life through my computer. I will be back to write more about these things later but for now I wanted to get the curtains back up and air out this new blog.